James Bond Finds Love in India (Bollywood Edition)

A comic set-piece — Harry in a suit auditioning for a Bollywood James Bond — shot around Ahmedabad with Will. The framing is a joke; the material underneath it is not.

Two things make it worth keeping. Gujarat is a dry state, so buying a bottle means a permit and a shop hidden in a hotel basement, and Harry films the whole transaction including a processing fee that never makes it onto the receipt. And the nine-course Gujarati dinner is the clearest explanation in the bundle of why an entire Indian state eats no meat at all.

Key moments

• [00:00] Alcohol is banned in Gujarat. Harry has a permit.
• [00:31] The shop turns out to be in the basement of a hotel, reached from outside — he compares it to a secret shop.
• [01:37] The staff insist an imported vodka is Indian.
• [02:11] And that Mount Everest is in India.
• [02:52] A bottle at 13,000, which he declines at speed.
• [03:22] Indian whisky at 1,100, about $15.
• [05:05] Plus a 100-rupee processing fee that isn’t on the receipt, which he asks viewers to explain to him.
• [06:21] He spots a wedding and walks straight into it, being the only person present dressed for it.
• [09:59] The Science Park, recommended to him as one of the best things to do in the city. The nature park has no animals in it.
• [11:39] Penguins, which he says is a jail rather than a sanctuary.
• [12:13] A zoologist among the visitors explains the aquarium to him.
• [13:20] His rating for the whole attraction: two out of ten.
• [13:38] A nine-course Gujarati dinner.
• [15:42] It is entirely vegetarian, because Gujarati cuisine is.
• [16:56] The reason, as his host gives it: eating meat is a sin, and so is alcohol. Tobacco is fine.
• [17:31] His rule for eating Indian food — mix everything, be creative, you can’t get it wrong.
• [18:03] A drinks menu concealed inside a hollow book, which he reads as hiding the alcohol.
• [19:39] A printed book is provided to explain each course, because he has no idea what he’s eating.
• [20:18] A deep-fried leaf under a sweet sauce, which he calls one of the best things he has eaten in India and, specifically, the best leaf of his life.
• [21:24] A palate cleanser between courses — his first.
• [21:57] The Gujarati thali, built as a pyramid. The kitchen works with 24 different vegetables, and he and Will are served different ones.
• [23:00] Dessert, with about ten components on the plate.
• [23:34] A ninth course, which is a digestive made with betel leaf.
• [24:05] He leaves a 1,000-rupee tip.
• [24:38] A date with a Nepali woman working in Gujarat, who says the work is twelve hours a day and hard.
• [25:10] Why there is a Tibetan market here: Tibetans displaced by the Chinese occupation live and work in India with the government’s permission.
• [27:23] A jet ski he isn’t allowed to drive, so a speedboat instead.

Extracted pages

• Place: Ahmedabad
• Country: India
• Person: Will
• Tips: Reward honesty and hard work